Tony Abbott has admitted he is “dismayed” by the poor performance of the Federal government, saying he is “profoundly disappointed” by its mishandling of pretty much everything.
“It’s not just the big things like Qantas or Holden. Look at Fiona Nash. We can’t even put some stars on a box of Jatz without it becoming a major scandal,” Mr Abbott said.
His comments come on the back of the jobless rate hitting a 15-year high.
“I just long for the days when I could wake up to a bad economic indicator like that, and come up with a zinger that skewered those responsible.”
“I’m particularly tired of my rookie mistakes. You know on election night I said Australia was “open for business”? I shouldn’t have said that,” he said. “If I were Bill Shorten, I’d be using that line to crucify me.”
“Luckily, Bill Shorten is Bill Shorten so at least I’ve been able to duck that one.”
“I think I just assumed I’d be able to skate by, laying the blame for problems on Labor incompetence – that worked pretty well in opposition.”
“But not even I am buying that anymore. Probably because trust in government was irrevocably eroded by the previous Labor government,” he said unconvincingly, before trailing off and walking away muttering to himself.